At any rate, this has resulted in an adult life of disappointment, with every coiffure — including three mullets and a blond dye job to my black hair — failing to live up to the standard. I’m like Al Bundy, reliving the glory days, except not with football but with hair.
So I tried L’Oreal’s new Shine Gloss ($9.99) product with enthusiasm. I was hoping that the redundancy in the product’s name meant that my hair would be extra, extra shiny.
The product promises to add “salon-quality shine” in 10 minutes and will last up to six weeks. According to L’Oreal, clear shine treatments are among the fastest growing trends in salons. The box looks like hair colouring and the contents appear to be colouring products, including rubber gloves, various bottles and a deep conditioner.
The process: You mix the “developer creme” with the “clear shine gloss” tube. Apply. Wait 10 minutes and rinse out. The stuff feels like olive oil on your hands but it rinses out easily. Note: your hair will have that chemical, wet dog smell afterward.
The verdict: After using the L’Oreal product, my hair had more shine but not enough for anyone to notice. (I irritated everyone I knew by asking them if they noticed something different about my hair and my favourite deadpan response was: “Did you wash it?”)
I might recommend the product to anyone who feels that their hair is as dull as hay and in desperate need of some luster. But if I’m going to go through the trouble of “dying” my head shiny, I want it to look like Rumpelstiltskin spun gold out of my hair. Overall, it didn’t get me any votes.
Previously published on the Ampersand, Nov. 17 2010.